OMG. Big news.

Ha ha this post is actually not going to be as exciting as the title leads you to think. Sorry. However, I am officially making thursdays: "Hat Tippin' and Thumb Bitin' Thursdays". Which roughly means I'm going to bore you with what I have found interesting in the past week, and what I have absolutely loathed. This should give you helpless plebeians some much needed structure.

TIP OF THE HAT goes to the youtube sensation Keyboard Cat. I was having an I-want-to-strangle-old-people day, and I stumbled upon this video. Soon enough I was grinning like Gary Busey.

Plastic Surgery Nightmare

To be honest the video is extremely cheesy and caters towards middle-aged women...but that furry bastard was tearing the keyboard up. Excuse my language. Expect better hat tips in the future.

BITE OF THE THUMB goes to Facebook groups involving the word "real". As in: A real boyfriend doesnt lie, hurt, cheat or hit their girlfriend. First of all, if the boyfriend is not real, does that mean he's imaginary? Or irrational (math jokes)? I think they meant "ideal". BUT GUESS WHAT LADIES, we guys will never be a prince charming, take you away on a carpet like Aladdin, or sprout rainbows from our butt cheeks. Don't get me wrong, I'm not endorsing beating or cheating on your girlfriend. But we are human, and we will lie. Of course, we can certainly strive to be better at the sensitive things, but you need to lower your expectations of our mating skills. We don't all know a kindly old friar that gives us relationship advice and illegal drugs (Romeo and Juliet). So enjoy our cheesy jokes and awkward conversations at parties, okay ladies?

I have this odd feeling that more and more people hate me everyday, just because of this blog. Like, a cult of you meet in a dark warehouse downtown and plot my murder. I would be cool with that. Peace.